After a long hiatus, the yellow hobbit is back to midrashing!!!
's Hebrew birthday, so I'm giving him a midrash.
Terah had 2 twin sons, Abraham, and Tsvi-Hersh-Efrayim. Abraham, being the eldest, was destined to inherit the family business, a store that sold wood idols of George Bush. It was located in the faraway kingdom of Huntsman Hall
However, one day Abraham wandered off into the woods, and met some crazy people with guitars, and unnaturally colored hair, who talked of this newfangled practice called "recycling" whereby one tree could be used again and again, instead of cutting them all down to make wood idols of George Bush. Abraham liked this idea, and liked these crazy people [they called themselves "hippies"] and came back singing their enchanting music.
His father and his brother thought he was crazy, but prayed to the idols for his recovery. Days went by, with no change. Abraham was still singing and recycling.
Eventually they decided that Tsvi-Hersh-Efrayim should get the family business, and Abraham should be sent back into the woods.
He picked up another enchanting melody, which he called "every time we touch." And as he sang it, the trees started moving. Their roots grew at an exponential rate, breaking through all barriers.
The trees broke into Huntsman Hall and into Terah's shop, and smashed the idols of George Bush.
As a result, Abraham became the very first iconoclast. And to this day he continues to love that word.